There are few things in life as instantly mood-boosting as being complimented. You look great, and you are doing . Accept a compliment, even if you feel uncomfortable. Praise from one's partner can make someone with low self-esteem feel pressured to live up to . You learn more. This is the main reason why we rarely give or receive compliments. 3 Tips for Receiving a Compliment. "I really put a lot of thought into this, thank you for noticing.". Receiving a compliment with ease and comfort demonstrates the character attribute of self-confidence and self-value. Be Sincere While it may seem harmless to pay someone an insincere compliment with good intentions, it can actually do more damage. There's also scientific proof that praise is an effective motivator. Put me down. Use these journaling prompts to help you discover your feelings about compliments and to dig deeper on what may make you feel uncomfortable. Let's say that a woman 'digged' you, but you don't really like her, that way. Researchers believe that the compliments made them perform better. If receiving a compliment makes you uncomfortable, you aren't alone. A 2012 study revealed that receiving compliments can help improve motivation and performance. Answer (1 of 10): > How do guys feel about receiving compliments? DelGreco and Denes adopted a research-based definition of a compliment as "a speech act which . You . A good compliment doesn't have to be related to one's appearance, Sussman says. Don't expect a compliment in return. Take some time to sense that part of you. His widely respected . A smile is always welcome, and a "thank you" can never go wrong. I hate recieving compliments. Share but Don't Transfer the Credit. Rather than just telling someone they look nice, tell that person: "You look so handsome in that blue shirt you're wearing. We'd love to hear them! We do this without even noticing. There are some guys who automatically think it's flirting, other might just smile and say thank you. Fight the urge to minimize the compliment by saying, "thank you, but". Yet, learning to do so graciously can enhance your executive presence and relationships with others. The desire for praise is obvious: Being told you're not good enough all the time takes a toll where you want to live up to the expectations and fail each time. Do you feel genuine when giving compliments? People with it can really struggle with both giving and getting compliments. If you think of something nice, say it. Here are five ways to respond to compliments more gracefully. Taking a heartfelt compliment with grace promotes a more positive way of life. This is not to be confused with arrogance/ego or selfishness. Why Compliments are Powerful. Given time, you'll feel it in your body, or you'll feel it. All you need to say is "Thank you" and smile! Work to maintain good eye contact (don't stare-that's weird), lean slightly forward, and engage those around you with warm facial expressions. According to Guy Winch, Ph. They may cast off kind words about themselves because they don't feel worthy of getting them. Additionally, if you love receiving compliments, please share in the comments what have been the best compliments you've received to date. If someone compliments you The best way to respond is to think about why they compliment you, if sincere, use it to your advantage or turn it off completely. Use the Language of Acknowledging. It matches your eyes." 4. Do you have difficulty accepting compliments? Anna Bartter looks into the brain-boosting power of a compliment. Alternatively, if it's not so nice, keep it to yourself. 161 votes, 141 comments. This is where someone gives you a compliment and you dismiss it by saying something that gives their compliment less value. 338 opinions shared on Flirting topic. Also, when someone else gives you a . Disagreement Disagreement when we receive a compliment is when we very politely disagree with the person giving the compliment. Ever since I started to really focus on receiving compliments in a positive way, I've noticed other people undermining the compliments they are given and it makes me feel awkward for them!. Truth is, most of what we accomplish is due, in part, to the assistance of others. Prioritizing giving over receiving may be a . The best way to respond is to accept it with grace when it comes to showing mercy or giving back if it isn't. But don't try to distract or insult the incoming message. TWO. Here are a few ways to respond to a compliment: "Thank you, it makes my day to hear that.". You see a positive shift in your productivity and efficiency levels. The easiest way to grow and develop confidence is to give and receive kind and . The first two of these strategies create a problem. D., low self-esteem is the #1 reason we are so quick to reject a compliment. It's quite the convoluted mess. It just doesn't ring true with your belief system. Many of us feel uncomfortable receiving praise because we don't want to appear egotistical and arrogant. Psychologist John Gottman most likely agrees. The most important thing is for it to be sincere. If anyone can explain it or feels similar We've been able to find scientific proof that a person performs better when they receive a social reward after completing an . The reason to do this is so you have a relationship with the part of you that freezes and goes numb. Ask a question Sometimes asking a follow-up question can help you better understand . Commending someone for a character trait, an achievement, or the effort that they put into doing something such as preparing a meal can go a long way. Person B: "You just haven't eaten Mike's food yet, now that's a good cook". Around 70% of people in a survey associated feelings of embarrassment and discomfort with praise. Men and women are different in many ways, but there's one thing we all have been wired to seek: appreciation. No justifications, no change of subject. ~ Mother Teresa. One of the ways prospective daters attempt to build rapport is through the use of compliments. If your compliment is rejected or deflected, don't take it personally! This is not dignified. Receiving praise from others elicits discomfort when it conflicts with one's existing belief system. Genuine appreciation is when you tell someone they're goo. We use cookies to provide you with a great experience and to help our website run effectively. Why do we feel this way? Yes, it is possible because when compliments become excessive, this might lead to an expectation to receive compliments for all work that we do, and when the time comes that fewer people are paying attention to us, it might make us lose our original motivation and momentum to succeed. Complimenting yourself offers many advantages in the long-run. ONE. Remember that people are not obliged to compliment you on anything - if they did it . If you minimize or completely deny the achievement . If your understanding of love as a child was along the lines of something you earned by doing things for other people (developmental trauma), receiving a compliment can feel like a debt or an . But let's go back to how YOU can compliment your man in a way that really makes a difference in how he sees you, and how attracted to you he feels. This leads to a vicious . You become less insecure. Luck 1 - DON'T: Undermine The Compliment. He might have been flustered because he wasn't accustomed to receiving compliments of that nature and was caught off-guard. Answer (1 of 3): If you feel there is something good about a certain person then you should compliment them. 3. "I am sensing something in me freezes and goes numb when I'm offered a compliment .". 48 adults were asked to learn and perform specific finger patterns, which involved pushing keys on a keyboard in a particular sequence, while their performance was timed. A compliment should make you feel good, and it should also make the complimenter feel good. When it comes to giving compliments, make. This can help make sure that our compliments get the desired effect on people's moods, as well as help us get over that awkward feeling or trepidation about giving out affirmations. "It takes both sun and rain for a flower to grow.". Ok, here's another question. Whether we're talking about eating a delicious fruit or making a salad: these are all mother nature's gifts. In other words, you make it clear, politely so, that the other person is wrong. A bit embarrassed to have the spotlight on me, but I would smile and say "Thank you!" "Thank you, I really . When men receive compliments, we feel special. For example: If you believe that you're a boring person and someone tells you how interesting you are, you're going to feel uncomfortable with hearing this. But you don't get burned to a crisp neither. Put me down or you will suffer the consequences. I don't know why but it makes me feel really weird. Receive from Mother Nature. Say thank you If you feel uncomfortable with compliments, a simple "thank you" is all you need to accept the kind words and validate the giver. Frankly speaking I compliment others when I genuinely feel the other person needs to be appreciated for his/ her good qualities. Norihiro Sadata, one of the study authors, said in a statement, "To the brain, receiving a compliment is as much a social reward as being rewarded money. There's this weird mixture of wanting praise, being embarrassed by it, and thinking the person wants something in return. You smile more. Receiving praise can actually have a multitude of benefits. Nevertheless, if you believe that positive reinforcement is better than punishment, you may be motivated to change this. Be grateful for all the beautiful things you have . We all want to be the star of our movie. Now, how you let her down real easy, so her feelings aren't hurt? 1. Receiving creates a moment of connection. How do you do this? 3. For example: Person A: "You are a really good cook". Before we start thinking about compliments and this nature of communication with others, I must begin by saying that it is something which can vary from person to person, their likes and dislikes, and the contexts they find themselves in. In fact, you might feel "shy", "corny", "dumb", or even "ridiculous" when someone compliments you. Here are some possibilities for why receiving is often more difficult than giving: Defense against intimacy. As I was leaving the office last night, I told a . There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than for bread. 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